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Couples Counselling & Marriage Therapy
For married, cohabiting, dating and same-sex couples facing conflict, communication difficulties, emotional distance or loss of trust.
Support for Couples
We work with all couples, including those who feel stuck in conflict, disconnected, or under pressure from trust, intimacy, or communication difficulties.
Qualified & Experienced
Each couples therapist holds at least one relevant Master’s degree and has a minimum of five years relevant experience.
Flexible Appointment Options
Appointments can be made throughout the week. Online and in person. Evenings and weekends too.
when things change
When a Relationship Becomes Difficult
Relationships can become strained in many different ways.
You may be having the same argument repeatedly without feeling heard or understood. One of you may want to talk while the other withdraws. Small disagreements may quickly become intense, leaving both of you feeling criticised, blamed or alone.
Some couples seek therapy after an affair or a serious breach of trust. Others are dealing with difficulties around sex and intimacy, the pressures of parenting, financial stress, family conflict or major changes in their circumstances.
Sometimes the relationship looks stable from the outside, but both partners feel emotionally distant. You may be questioning whether you still love one another, whether the relationship can recover, or whether separation is the only possible way forward.
Speak to a Couples Therapist
familiar patterns
Why do Couples Become Stuck in Conflict?
There is rarely one explanation for the difficulties between two people.
Current pressures can place a relationship under strain. So can the history that each person brings into it. Earlier experiences of rejection, loss, betrayal, criticism or emotional neglect can shape what each partner expects from the other and how they respond when they feel hurt.
A disagreement about money, sex, parenting or household responsibilities may also carry meanings that are not immediately visible. One person may experience a request as criticism. The other may experience withdrawal as indifference. Each reaction can then intensify the other.
Over time, couples can become organised around familiar positions. One pursues conversation while the other avoids it. One demands reassurance while the other becomes defensive. Both may feel that they are reacting to the other person, without seeing how the pattern continues between them.
Understanding this pattern is not about deciding who is to blame. It is about making it possible to speak about what has been happening and consider whether something different can take shape.
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Our Memberships
moving forward
How Can Couples Therapy Help?
Couples therapy provides a regular space in which both partners can speak about the relationship with a trained psychotherapist present.
The therapist listens to what is being said, but also to what repeatedly becomes difficult to say. Attention is given to the arguments, silences, disappointments and misunderstandings that have come to define the relationship.
This can help a couple recognise patterns that are difficult to see from inside the relationship. It may become possible to understand what happens immediately before conflict escalates, what each person is trying to communicate, and why attempts to repair the situation have not worked.
The aim is not to introduce a judge or referee. Couples therapy is not about deciding which partner is right, giving instructions about how you should behave, or forcing a couple to remain together.
It is a space to work honestly with what is taking place between you. For some couples, this may create the possibility of repairing the relationship. For others, it may help them think more clearly about separation and how to move forward with less hostility and confusion.
Get Starteda considered approach
Our Approach to Couples Therapy
Our couples therapists work from different professional approaches, including Psychoanalytic Psychotherapy, Emotionally Focused Therapy and Integrative.
The work is shaped around the couple, the difficulties they are facing and the therapist’s clinical understanding of what may help. Therapists may focus closely on recurring patterns, past experiences, attachment, communication, expectations and the interaction between partners.
Our therapists do not assume that every couple’s difficulties have the same cause or can be addressed through a standard programme. The aim is to understand what is happening between you and create a space in which both partners can speak, listen and consider what they want to change.
There may be occasions when a couples therapist suggests that both partners, or one partner, might also benefit from individual therapy.
Each of our couples therapists holds at least one relevant master’s degree and participates in regular clinical supervision. Their qualifications, professional memberships and experience are available on their individual profiles.
Speak to a Therapist
getting started
Beginning Couples Therapy
You do not need to agree in advance about what the main problem is, or arrive with clear reasons or fully developed ideas about what you want from therapy. You can begin by speaking about what has been happening and what has brought you to consider couples therapy.
Both partners are encouraged to speak about what has brought them to therapy, how the difficulties have developed and what they would like help with.
The therapist may ask about recurring arguments, communication, trust, intimacy, infidelity, family life and previous attempts to address the difficulties. You can also discuss whether you are hoping to repair the relationship, make a decision about its future or find a less damaging way of separating.
The first session is also an opportunity to consider whether couples therapy and the therapist’s approach feel suitable for you.
Appointments are available in our Dublin 2 clinics throughout the week, including evenings and weekends. Online couples therapy is available where appropriate.
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FAQ
Do both partners need to attend couples therapy?
Yes. Both partners need to attend the first session so the therapist can understand the relationship and hear from each of you.
There may be occasions when the therapist suggests that one or both partners also attend individual sessions. This can sometimes help explore personal difficulties that are affecting the relationship.
Can couples therapy help after an affair?
Yes. Infidelity is a common reason couples contact us. Couples therapy can provide a space to speak about the affair, the loss of trust and its impact on both partners. Some couples want to repair the relationship, while others are uncertain about staying together. Therapy does not assume either outcome.
What if one of us is thinking about separation?
You do not need to have made a final decision before beginning couples therapy. Therapy can help you understand what has happened, consider whether the relationship can change and think more clearly about the future.
Is couples therapy suitable where there has been abuse?
Couples therapy may not be appropriate where there is violence, intimidation, coercive control or abuse. Individual support may be more suitable in these circumstances.
How much will it cost?
Couples sessions cost €130 per appointment.
Is couples therapy advice-based?
No. Couples therapy is not about the therapist acting as a judge, referee or relationship coach. The work focuses on understanding what is happening between you, why familiar patterns continue and what each of you may want to change.
Can couples therapy take place online?
Yes. We provide online couples therapy also where appropriate.
Can non-romantic partners attend couples therapy?
Yes. We also work with family members, friends and colleagues where repeated disagreements, tension or communication difficulties have become difficult to resolve.
Will couples therapy keep us together?
Couples therapy cannot guarantee that a relationship will continue, and its purpose is not to keep every couple together at any cost. It provides a space to understand what has happened between you, whether the relationship can change and what each of you wants for the future.
For some couples, this may create a possibility of repair. For others, therapy may help them think more clearly about separation and move forward with less hostility and confusion.
Can you convince my partner to come to couples therapy?
No. A therapist cannot persuade or pressure someone to attend. Consent, autonomy and motivation are crucial elements of any therapy.
Both partners need to attend the first session, but you do not need to arrive with the same level of motivation or the same understanding of the problem.
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Our Couples Therapists
We regularly see people facing conflict, emotional distance, communication difficulties, affairs, intimacy concerns and uncertainty about the future of a relationship.
We also commonly work with non-romantic couples, including family members, friends and colleagues, where tensions or repeated disagreements have become difficult to resolve.
Each therapist brings their own clinical training and way of working, including psychoanalytic, emotionally focused and integrative approaches. They hold at least one relevant master’s degree, belong to appropriate professional bodies and engage in regular clinical supervision.
Master’s trained
Five+ years relevant experience
Individualised treatment for each couple
What the Research Says
2012 — Couples therapy helps most distressed couples (Lebow) [1]
In a major review of outcome research on couple distress, the evidence shows couples therapy has a positive impact for ~70% of couples who receive it.
1999 — Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy shows strong outcomes (Johnson et al.) [2]
A review of EFT outcome research found substantial reductions in relationship distress. In several studies discussed in the review, approximately 70%-73% of couples met criteria for recovery at follow-up.
2016 — Psychodynamic couple therapy in routine clinical practice (Hewison et al.) [3]
In a large naturalistic UK clinic setting across 877 participants, psychodynamic couple therapy was associated with significant improvements in psychological distress and relationship satisfaction.
2020 — Couples therapy effects across core relationship outcomes (Roddy et al.) [4]
In a meta-analysis, couples therapy showed large improvements in relationship satisfaction, while couples on a waitlist showed little/no improvement over the same time period. The review also found significant gains in key domains including communication and emotional intimacy.
Research Summary
Research suggests that around 70% of couples experience meaningful benefit from couples therapy, particularly in relationship satisfaction, communication and emotional intimacy.
It’s important to note that outcomes vary between couples, depending on many variables, and are not guaranteed.
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